Traffic and Tits

Los Angeles- I love you, but DAMN.

It took me half an hour to drive a block and a half. A small block- one with only an Office Depot and a Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf on it. I finally turned around and decided to backtrack to a different freeway entrance. Of course, I got lost! And I somehow ended up on Rodeo Drive. Haha, wow, only in Beverly Hills right? Altogether, it took me 2 hours to drive 12 dinky miles. It wasn't even the freeway's fault- it was the roads'. I finally just started driving like a maniac and screaming like a mad man. Do you do that sometimes? Probably not. It must be the pollution.

ANYWAYS! Today, I met my first big client. It was crazy- he sang his famous song right there in our office, and signed a bunch of CDs for us. It was cool.

I realized something new this week. Being in Beverly Hills really takes a toll on a girl's confidence. No matter how cute I think I am that day, well... there's a gorgeous celebrity around the corner, so it doesn't matter. Because, it's just normal talk to hear a co-worker say "oh, I saw Megan Fox today." Wow. And if I'm thinking, "oh, I like my outfit today." Well, honey, it's not all brand name designer, so you fail. And if it is, it's probably not couture, I mean Louis Vuitton didn't have that on the runway tailored to your size, so its not good enough. Ouch! You just gotta strut like you own the place, no matter who you're wearing- it's the only way to preserve an ounce of confidence in this place.

I think my next door neighbor is a porno star or something. She has gigantic boobs (which I'm sure are fake) that were hard not to stare at because her shirt was so low. They were amazing. Even if she's not a porno star, she must do something that has to do with huge tits. Honestly. If I had those, I would too.

I guess that's what you do in LA- find something to make yourself stand out. Boobs, designer labels, botox, whatever. And yes, hella people have botox here. And they walk their dogs everywhere, outfit and all. Cute, poor little things.

I noticed that everyone has a BMW, a Mercedes, an Audi, a Jaguar, or a Lexus. I'm not even lying. And a lot of them are tinted. I'm ALWAYS looking in them to see if I can spot someone. Haha! I'm so embarassing. I think I might have seen Kristin Stewart today, but I might just be making that up. If it was her, she had some shades on. I always drive by Fox Studios on my way home, and I always see NICE ass cars coming out of there. Of course, I'm looking in there super hard too. But, still no sure celeb sighting yet!

I'll keep you updated.